The Spinster's

"there comes a point in your life when you realise who matters, who never did, who won't be anymore, and who always will. so don't worry about people from your past, there's a reason why they didnt make it to your future."

reflected on this line again. i guess it is true.

it has been quite a crazy week. did a few last minute re-arrangement of stuffs which just simply reflect on my poor time management. and ya, frickle-minded-ness.

i think i need a notebook to plan out my timeline. for every single day.
and of cos a footnote - time waits for no one; he is not 'time', you are not 'no one'.

-17th NOV '07-
finally the very very awaited day is over. our windsurf event. glad that fellow participates had fun trying out the new sport and we had all the fun&joy in planning the event. shall get the photos and blog about it again. till then(:

i have something in mind which i want to do. but i am losing the heart to.

that is when you fear you will lose yourself again.
and here comes a point that you absolutely feel you have nothing in this world.

christmas is coming again.

lightings @ orchard are exceptionally beautiful this time round. white lights! they should have realise this long ago and abandon all the yellow orangey lights. i cant stop snapping pictures of those. if only there are near enough for touch... (: and not forgetting the pink christmas tree is up outside cathay again! really something pretty(: decorations inside vivo is quite cute too. shapes made of fake green christmas leaves (?) look xmas-y enough but yet v. dumb. haha. yea, so kindof cute.

merry christmas. to you.

and all of a sudden, just as i thought i really detest you for all you have left me with, i... feel like hearing your voice again. i know i am not supposed to be that weak.

it feels terrible to gasp for air alone. friends, please breathe along.

xxxx, supermean

i have no idea why he was so apologetic for that mistake he made. even to the extent of being self-incriminating. i feel rather awkward to know he felt so guilty while others most probably took no more than 5 secs to forget. and that 'others' include me.

but that makes me wonder if i have been taking things way too easy.
or maybe i have not been putting efforts in things i do and hence, expecting mistakes. too huge a leeway.

he takes pride in his work.
that is something i should be ashame of.

today is not a good day. i dreamt a tired dream and started my day off thinking of reasons to skip work. i pictured a few dollar notes and rolled myself off comfy bed.

i need some hugs.

fellow-bimbo(: this is quite similar as your newest fashion loot hur.

i feel so beaten.

xxxx, supermean

snap, (laugh about it), transfer, save, (look and laugh about it again, send to related people, arrange to folders), leave it there.

whens the next time you view those photos again?

o5s78. i miss arms-over-shoulders photos.

marys. i dont know how ppl agreed to take pointless photos for us.

chalet06. my favourite woman and man.

then i remember how we can be "at the bottom of the pit... and still digging", my one-and-only-so-far-away taitai, the guy who let me paint his pinky's nail (of cos with hot pink) and went around town with it, the ever-worrywart konglong, and manymany others who know who is "bok" is.

i miss you girls. (and my donuts @ suntec =b)

i still think we look rather cool. though we know we can never be in that room. haha!
but hey, when are we gonna hit the drums again?

random: omg! your eyes are really BIIIGGG!

please do not laugh by yourself again (like that time at the roti-prata table when cindy and me were away queuing up). i guess we very much love to do all the things we did together, again.

i think i were having my best times then. i really miss them. each and everyone.

F R I E N D S

lovesss, supermean

i feel like a big piece is violently chunked out of me. i viewed through everything and realised how a part is significantly missing.

it is like living a recycled life; you used up your energy, you expressed with overstretched muscles,

you loved with all you could ever love,
then you broke down all over, and pick up all the broken pieces. repeat.

but again, i am thinking differently about the 'big' and 'significantly'. i dont think i remember much now.

i feel upbeat :D at least for now. happy lamps are shining bright!

had mad laughing session at the booth today. not forgetting the bimbo moments captured. 'self shots' (with help of others), self timer, multi shots are fun. i guess we provided enough entertainment for those behind the other side of the glass.

my phone perks me up again.

lovelovelove, supermean

i am so glad to be under some sort of 'music therapy', or whatever u called it(: xiexieni for the compiled list of :D:D:D-songs. i must really say it works very well. esp jaychou's 甜甜的 which is uper sweeeeeet.

i think i have used up my emo-quota for the month. (which has barely started!) so yep, please be more UP AND ON, supermean!

somehow... i have come up with some stories to make myself feel a little better. that is the best i can do. hah hah ---

supermean

jaychou's songs are really tears-intriguing. like how it jeopardised whatever-i-was-trying-to-do last night.

my hands went really cold. and again, i felt so overflown.

hear me laugh, supermean

there goes another week. it has been a less fulfilling week... with almost zero effort to mug. hmm... i have no idea since when mugging is a measuring unit of fulfillment too. haha!

i think i am just bumming around!

but still. i had one very smiley(: saturday with jace and binbin. did alot of catching up and... talked, shopped, ate... and alot alot alot of hahahaha-ing. anyway... -hug binbin!-
but then... you two are very life-threatening to me! with your weird obsessions with horror movies. please dont pull me along. -shivers-

well well. something really depressing (and random)... i am left with 21.33minutes of 魔女幼熙! only! ... and the loading seems stucked now. haha!

on a serious note, i really miss cindy alot. feel like ringing her up and scream "wow! u actually notice your phone light up and pick up my call! omg. i feel so lucky!". feel like messaging her and receive her reply at a much later time and still, very hyped up. feel like nua-ing together~~~ and i want to bake thingsss with you, and then we can gorge together. haha! (i think i should reply your email soon. bwahahaha :b)

-

"there comes a point in your life when you realise who matters, who never did, who won't be anymore, and who always will. so don't worry about people from your past, there's a reason why they didnt make it to your future."

i just thought i agree alot to that. but i think... i still want a friend. just a friend. simply because, i dont want everything to go into waste.

nothing is that difficult. i have given everything up.

xxxx, supermean

if you know how to "chill" and what is "htht", and you find yourself (dutifully) petting people's pets, starting to be able to relate mushroom to human, using "it is the bin laaa~~~" for some things you cant explain... you will most probably believe that you actually ran 2.4km when you laughed for 15 minutes, and that all pyjamas are unisex, and lastly, seriously think that being gay... is really GAY:D

-hug-

then im pretty sure you guys know that... the world is coming to an end soon(:

they cheer me up. alot.

(yay-ness. im done with the slumber night photos, which are really gay and dumb. haha! we look more like we were from IMH. but still~ we won the dodgepillow that night. i guess... we shine in the night. haha.)

backback.

saw this very familar person yesterday. i was just wondering if it was her. i could only smile faintly. i wish i waved, relaxed myself, was as blinded as usual. just because i know, she really made me think quite a bit.

i wonder hows life.

dont really know why all bad things happen at the same time. or maybe, all good things too. they bring people up way too high... and then the next moment, down. i detest extremes. but again, if i stood firm and calm enough, i can only be very much suck/stuck to the ground.

i am starting to like my handphone. because it receives calls.

lovelovelove, supermean